I’m starting a short series I like to call “nerd stuck at home.” While we can’t go to festivals or conventions at the moment and show off our costumes, I certainly can upload silly videos of myself wearing costumes from my overly full costume closet for your amusement. It’s like a virtual convention. Feel free to post your own cosplays below too, and complain about the incredibly expensive hotel food, like we are all having fun together in the non-plague alternate universe.
While I’ve been spending more time at home this year than I have ever before, I decided it’s nice to have someone around who is always listening, and you can definitely count on Alexa for that. It took me some time to put robot paranoia aside and let her inside of my home. In fact, we got in an argument the first week when she kept taking what I was saying out of context, and I unplugged her. But we’ve improved our communication since then and get along much better now. So well in fact, that I’ve also been assimilated into the Amazon Affiliate program. We are the Alexa. Please click on the links below if you would like to be assimilated too. Resistance is futile.
One of the first things I did was change Alexa’s awake word to “Computer,” because Star Trek: The Next Generation is what I always secretly hoped the future would be like. And while we wallow in disappointment at that shattered dream particularly after the last year, there are some things you can do in your own home to live that fantasy anyway.
You, too, can have all this fun, with just a few gadgets, for less than $100. I
will admit I am as cheap as I can be, so I’ll try to let you know some
workarounds too while also convincing you to assimilate.
Tea, Earl Grey, Hot
Your replicator is just a smart socket away. Mine isn’t
perfect, in fact my tea maker made me English Breakfast Tea when I clearly
asked for Earl Grey. But any tea or coffee maker with an on/off switch can be
set up with an Alexa routine that turns your smart socket on to your already turned
on and plugged in appliance which is triggered by a keyword, such as “Tea, Earl
Grey, Hot.” You do have to prep the water and tea in advance. There’s a chance
that’s exactly how the replicators on the Enterprise worked though, too. But
the extra effort is worth the daily giggle when I take my high tea and pretend
to be both British and in space. Here’s an image of the routine I used to set
this up, and the products that helped make it happen:
I have an older and cheaper version of this one currently selling on
Amazon (but I’ve used mine for years and love it):
You should note, that Jeff Bezos is a big Star Trek fan too,
and there’s already a ton of easter eggs in the Alexa app and Echo Dot (I mean,
Computer is already a set awake word!) – so sometimes when you say “Tea, Earl
Grey, Hot” you might get a snarky response like “Our replicators are currently
broken.” I don’t mind a little snark with my AI, I’ve always been a big fan of
robots like K-2S0 or Marvin the Paranoid Android. But it can be a little
challenging when you start connecting actual appliances, so proceed at your own
risk.
Here's the image of the routine from the Alexa app:
Red Alert
When you feel threatened while staying at home, or if you
simply want to startle one of your guests with this Silly Smart House trick, just
call out Red Alert. The Alexa app already has the Red Alert sound as one of the
sound effects in the sci-fi option. Just add some smart bulbs to the mix to
your routine, so the lights and sound go together when you give the command.
Here’s the smart bulbs I’m using:
Here's the routine I used for Red Alert in the app:
On Screen
I tried this first unsuccessfully with my Roku, but had
better luck with a Fire Stick like this one:
Essentially – in the routine I’m connecting the command “On
Screen” to this Youtube video for up to 30 minutes of staring at stars whizzing
by and wondering how we don’t hit them with our spaceship: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xSOB6mEoBlI Using the Echo Dot to search the Roku for that video didn’t work as well, but
if you are using Google assistant it might be easier – my search words are “Play
Nokem Enterprise D Bridge Ambiance on Youtube.” As a bonus, from the Fire Stick
it even turns on my TV with the command and goes straight to the Youtube video.
Here's the routine:
Energize
If you say “Beam me up” to Alexa, you get a lot of funny
different responses. In the video I’m just reacting to one of the ones she gave
me. In the routine, I connected my smart bulbs that I used for Red Alert above
to be one purple and one blue to go with the Alexa “beam me up” command, and
connected that to the word “energize” to not confuse her with the easter egg
command that’s already built in.
COMBADGE
So far, if you found a tea maker on sale somewhere but got
the other items highlighted in this blog, you paid just around $100 to make
your house your own Star Trek holodeck that can change the color of your lights,
turn on your TV to watch Star Trek, and makes tea for you from your voice
commands. Not a bad investment. For a more economical version, you also can use just the Alexa app
instead of the Echo Dot above, and connect it to your smart plug and lights for
a $25 version and have about as much fun!
But probably my most important product endorsement is this
one:
This made me giggle so much from the moment I opened the
box. It’s a working Bluetooth connected licensed Star Trek Combadge, that can
connect to your phone or Alexa. I will say that for Alexa, it works more as a
speaker instead of as a headset speaker/microphone, so you can use the badge to
play all the Alexa voice commands but she can’t hear you if you go in another
room with it. You can instead connect the Combadge to your phone, and it will
work as both a speaker and a microphone that way, and you can make calls on it,
for a more working “real” version.
I got an older version where the magnet and battery life
aren’t as good but hoping to upgrade to their newer version that fixes those
issues, and when I do I’ll make a new video posting the things you can do with
the Combadge specifically.
However you need to justify this purchase for yourself, you
should. Resistance is futile.
But most importantly stay safe, wear a mask, so we can all
Live Long and Prosper, friends!